The kindness of a stranger.

I thought I'd share something I witnessed on the way to work the other morning because it really moved me.

I was on the bus on the way to work when I saw a middle aged man get on the bus. He looked pretty spaced and unsteady on his feet and like he needed a good wash.  A few minutes later I looked across and he was stumbling across the bus towards a girl, probably in her early 20's, who had her back to me.  He sat on the seat next to her and put one arm over her shoulders and the other across her front, in an embrace and laid his head on her shoulder. I realised she was crying.  He continued to hug her for a good few minutes, muttering to her in a gentle voice, "It's alright girl".  At which point I got off the bus.

I actually felt quite choked up. It was such a sweet, child-like thing to do. I'm sure everyone else on the bus would have been thinking should I go over? But everyone else is welded to their seats, worrying about whether she would want them to intrude. Part of it I suppose it is being on a bus, where you have a captive audience  and quite often people aren't talking either.

I personally don't know that I would want a stranger to come and hug me like that and for so long (!) but it was a really touching and 'human' thing to do.  It made me feel ashamed that I would feel that I can't go up to a stranger and offer support.

I've had a few discussions with friends recently about interactions on bus journeys.  I personally don't often start conversations with people on buses and I tend to be quite closed (particularly in the morning), which is really sad. I worry that I'll start a conversation with someone, then feel I have to talk to them every morning and that seems like effort at 7am.  However, when travelling I would be open to speaking to fellow travellers on long distant journeys (as long as I wasn't feeling too nauseous!).

So....what I do take from this? Well, I aim to be more open to meeting and talking to people everyday, however that manifests itself. I guess I should come up with some better openers, rather than, "So, how are you finding the weather?" But that's a start :-)

Inspirational Pole Dancing Routine

I thought I'd post a link to this video, because I think it really shows what pole-dancing is really about: strength, grace, flexibility and creativity.

By the way - you should be 18 to go to this video, only because of the other videos/ads that come up alongside it!

Amazing pole-dance video

Broadened Horizons - the delights of Couchsurfing.

I have been away from home for a little over a year now and in Vancouver 9 months.  Although I love the city and my life here I have begun to feel restless - that I am back in to a mundane routine and I was missing the excitement of moving from place to place.

We originally came away again because we were looking for something. Yes, we wanted to see the world but we also knew that we wanted to experience as much as we could before we settle and, I know it's a cliche but, I think I have been doing some soul searching more recently, trying to figure out what I want from life and what my priorities are.  I haven't quite figured that out yet but I feel I did get a bit closer this weekend.

I have just arrived home from a weekend away in Portland with two other ladies, one who I have known for a few months and I see her most weeks at our art nights - Rachel.  The other I just met on Saturday - Lorena.  We had a great time, I thoroughly enjoyed their company and we spent the whole weekend talking about all kinds of issues, from Monsanta, LSD, ethical farming of marine life, sustainability, the after-life....pretty deep stuff!

Our weekend was also helped along tremendously by our host, Gina. I have to say we were a bit cheeky because we only messaged her on the way to Portland to ask if 3 rather than 2 of us could stay with her (not really acceptable Couch Surfer behaviour) however she took it in her stride and was the most amazing host.  She too is  an incredible person, with lots of interests and lots to share.  She took us all over her city.

And although it was great to visit a new place, and I thought that's what I needed - to get out of Vancouver.  It was spending time with and meeting these great people that made the weekend.  I have come away invigorated and excited about the way my life is going.  And just chatting to each of these individuals, each sharing their perspective, experiences and ideas, it feels like I have broadened my outlook on life and the possibilities. I have confirmed some of my own ideas and questioned others.

And surely that is what travel and life is about; asking questions of yourself, challenging your pre-existing ideas? I think sometimes what happens when you have an established life and routine in one place is that you don't as frequently interact and talk with different people and this is what limits us.  So maybe we're more inclined to accept a path and we stick to it.

I've always had an idea that I should find a career, make some money and settle down and that we were going travelling before we did this.  That this was our 'last chance'.  The biological clock is ticking and all that.  But I'm finding the longer I'm away, the more places I visit and the more people I meet from different backgrounds, the goal posts shift. I see different possibilities for myself and although I have vague idea which direction I want to go in, there are so many possibilities and I'm not so worried about how long it takes me to get to my destination but more about taking the scenic route!

This was one of the realisations I came too this weekend but also that you can have new and exciting experiences where ever you are just by interacting with stimulating and inspiring people that ask meaningful questions.

Being a Tourist again!

We have been in Vancouver for 5 months now and I was beginning to feel that I hadn't really made the most of being here, as so much of our time had been taken up with job hunting and we were so short on cash.  However, more recently, I have been able to make the most of weekends and enjoy what Vancouver has to offer.

At the beginning of June my mum came for a 2 week holiday and I took a week off work to spend time with her.  Not only was it fantastic getting to spend some quality time with her but it was also an excuse to be a tourist and explore the surrounding area a bit more.

So on the first weekend we went out to White Rock, which a pretty seaside resort with a long promenade following the coast, and a wooden pier.  It's only a 40 minute drive out of Vancouver and is worth a visit, for the gelato and fish and chips alone!

Next we had a long day exploring the Sea to Sky Highway between Vancouver and Whistler.  It's a beautiful drive, however most of the viewpoints cannot be accessed on the way to Whistler only on the way back.  We were lucky to have a mostly clear day so the views were exhilarating.

It was also my first trip to Whistler and we paid to go on the Peak2Peak Gondola which I would definitely recommend, it is well worth the money.  Again stunning views from Blackcomb mountain across the valley, where the village sits, and the lakes behind.  On the way back we stopped off in Squamish to try and find somehwere to eat.  First of all it took a while of driving around to find Squamish itself.  Happily though we found a picturesque river walk.  Squamish itself is not worth a visit, unless you are in to outdoor pursuits like hiking, kayaking and rock climbing - in which case it is a must. Before you reach Squamish there is the Chief.  It is famous for challenging rock climbing and the 3 summit hike.

A few weeks earlier I had done the 1st summit of this hike.  It is a really exciting hike, as to reach the summit you have to climb ladders and chains in order to scramble up the rock face and reach the breath-taking views at the top.  If it is best to go during the week and avoid public holidays as it gets very busy and this can ruin the 'edge of the world' ambience when you reach the top!

Over the weekend I finally got myself over to Vancouver island and I'm really looking forward to exploring more of the island.  We drove around Sooke which was very pretty.  We enjoyed a picnic on the beach at Ed MacGregor Park, where John managed to spot a seal.  It has a long boardwalk that follows the coast over the water.  It was secluded and beautiful.  We spent the afternoon driving back to Victoria along the coast road, exploring the many beaches and beach side parks, dotted with the exotic looking Arbutus tree, with it's vivid rusty, cellophane like bark.

Of course there are other sights that are a must around the city and I made sure mum hit them all!  A really fun day out starts with a walk down Davie Street towards English Bay, you can then walk along the coast path around Stanley Park.  if you have time you can venture in to the forest and find your way to Beaver Lake and the aquarium, I am told it a must see - although I haven't been yet.

Another pleasant evening is spent at the public markets on Granville Island and enjoying fish and chips or a salmon burger while listening to one of the many buskers.  WE also went along to Bistro 101 which is the restaurant and cafe operated by the Pacific Institute of Culinary Arts.  It offers 3 course meals MOn-Thurs for under $25 a head.  The food was fantastic, I was very impressed.  We were even offered a selection of breads and different flavoured butters.
http://www.bistro101.com/

I would also recommend visiting Lighthouse Park on the north shore.  It has lots of little low-key trails that wind in and out of the forest, over logs and bolders with windy views over small rocky coves.
Lighthouse Park hike

The cite itself is great but if you want to get out and around BC it's definitely easier if you have a car.  For example if you want to visit Vancouver island.  Then it will take you about an hour and a half to get to the ferry terminal, by bus and sky train, then 1 hour and a half on the ferry.  Once you are on the island it will take you about 40 minutes-1 hour on the bus to get in to downtown Victoria.  So it can be a bit of a trek!

Highlights so far...

So we have now been in Vancouver for over 3 months.  I can't believe it!  Don't really feel we've made the most of our time here because we're spending so much time job hunting and our financial situation is always so uncertain.  But hey!

Having said that we are having a great time and love it here in Vancouver, so I thought I'd write a quick post about the things we have done here that we would recommend to others visiting Vancouver.
1) If you are planning to stay in the city for a little while I would recommend signing up to CouchSurfing.  This is a community which started off as a site where people would offer up their couch/a spare room to fellow travellers for free.  In Vancouver there is a large CS/traveller community and if you sign up to CS there are always different events going on that you can join.  There is usually a meet up every week in one of the many bars/restaurants around downtown.  Everyone is always very friendly and open to meeting new people.  Someone usually arranges a hike for the weekend.  And if you ever fancy a trip some where, you can post a message online and usually someone will want to join you!

2) Of course if you are a fan of skiing or snowboarding Vancouver and wider BC is the place to come.  An hour drive from the city there is a choice of 3 mountains that you can buy passes for: Grouse, Seymour and Baker.

We bought an end of season pass for Seymour, which meant we only had to go 3 times to save money.  Night skiing has been a definite highlight so far.  All the time I have been skiing on Seymour, the visibility has been really bad, which is a shame.  But on this occasion it added to the ambiance!  It was amazing going up the short ski lift through the fog feeling like you were travelling in to the abyss, not being able to see more than a couple of dozen feet ahead.  Beneath us there are huge lamps that light the runs at night and they bathe the mountain in an orange glow between the now covered conifer trees.  I kept expecting to see Mr Tumnus talking to Lucy amongst the trees!

3) Another activity I would highly recommend is snow shoeing.  We were really lucky when we went because it was beautiful clear day and we had great views from the top of the mountain.  We went to the Hemlock Valley, our friends had found a great deal on Group On.  It took us a couple of hours to drive out there and it was the first time I had ventured out of Vancouver.  It was really interesting to drive out through the suburbs, past docks and industrial areas in to the large flat farm land surrounded by abrupt snow capped mountains.  We then wound up in to the mountains, the roads getting increasingly slippery and treacherous.  When we arrived at the tiny resort I was suprised how deep the snow was. A path had been dug between the car park and ski centre and the snow was piled up over Martin's head!
Walking in the snowshoes takes a bit of getting used to, but it was so much fun.  Then on the way down we were sliding down dykes down the mountain and having snow fights.

4)  There are plenty of beaches around Vancouver and as soon as the sun is out that is where everyone goes.  I love English Bay near Stanley Park although I should think it is packed in the summer.



There are loads of other reasons to come to Vancouver, but those are our highlights so far!

A different life


As I've said before, part of our trip was not just about travelling but changing our lives for the 
better, and I want to record and share some of that.  Over the last few months we've talked a lot about what aspects of our lives we liked and what we wanted to change or improve about ourselves.  It came down to just our family and friends, and our flat that we really liked.  And those are the things that we are really missing now and we wish we could pick up and move with us.


There were several areas that I wanted to examine and try to improve on in my life:


Work: 

I did really enjoy my first 2 years of teaching and I really landed on my feet, in most ways, starting out at OJS.  I met a lot of great people who were extremely supportive and will continue to be good friends and of course the kids were fantastic.  But and I knew after 2 years I wanted a change and that I wanted to go back to working in 'special education'.  This is where my heart is.  I am really interested and passionate about working with young people with Autism, in particular.  Now I am in Vancouver this is the area of work I am pursuing.  I have now added another page, about getting back in to this line of work, my experiences of working with young people with Autism and also anything I've read or watched about this area that I think might be interesting to people!

I also decided that when I go back to being a teacher I need to find a way to have a better work/life balance.  I'd lost who I was apart from being a teacher!

Fitness:


In the year or so before I left the UK, I finally discovered a sport that I enjoyed doing - Pole Dancing.  In fact I became a bit obsessed with it.  So I have added a page to track my progress, when I can finally afford to go classes again that is!  But so far I have added pictures of some pole that I did while travelling and also a video of a pro!  Watch this if you still have a 'sleazy, lap-dance club' image of pole dancing!

Diet and Cooking:


Now, I've always felt that I ate a reasonably healthy diet - 'everything in moderation' being my motto. But I was aware that we could eat more fruit and veg and that some foods didn't agree with me! I knew that my repertoire of recipes was very limited and based on convenience.  So my quest now is to experiment more with cooking, buy more organic food and increase my awareness and understanding of how different foods and minerals can effect our bodies.

I've created a page to add any info I find out about diet and any recipes I think other people might like!

Creativity:


Before I started on the long road (well it was longer for me than most!) to teaching Fine Art was my passion and it consumed all of my time as a teenager.  Unfortunately, this is an area of my life that has almost completely disappeared, especially since teaching.  So I have vowed to spend more time being creative, therefor one of the first things I have done is ordered some wool to make felt!  I plan to make the most of the time I have free while I'm waiting to start work!  I have also been working hard at doing some basic photo-editing of all our thousands of pictures I have taken over our travels and I'm trying to learn how to be more creative with Photoshop.

I've created a new page to show off some of my projects!

Artifacts.

So...we have been in Vancouver a month now and it continues to be really exciting and promising! I'm really chuffed with how well we've done in such little time and what we have done in the last 6 months with such little money. It's been a real adventure.

We are now settled in to our flat and are really enjoying living with Ami and Michael. It's really great to be living with such positive and open-minded people who are always looking at their own lives and striving to improve themselves and achieve their goals. I think it's going to be a really positive experience for us. Throughout our travels we have done a lot more reflecting about what it was we wanted to change about our lives and it's helpful to be around people who live very different but fulfilling lives that we can take inspiration from!

Having said that, sometimes it feels very lonely and frustrating to feel like we're starting again. And also because we're not properly earning again, money is tight. I'm actually really missing all my belongings and clothes, jewellery etc. All those things that make me feel like I'm home and like 'me'. I've been feeling guilty and ungrateful for feeling a bit down that I don't have all my belongings and such a limited and cheap (!) wardrobe. Martin and I had been talking about this being a chance to reinvent ourselves and that we could create whole new identities for ourselves. But the reality is we don't have the money to do that and actually I don't want to reinvent myself - I quite like who I am!

At home I often feel guilty (see a theme?!) for buying clothes, accessories or something for the house that isn't absolutely essential. I feel it's gluttonous and that I don't deserve to when other people don't have any disposable income and can barely feed themselves. I've been thinking about why I want particular clothes or jewellery or a new haircut and for me I think it is to individualise myself, show some of my personality. Although I suppose other people have different reasons - to display wealth, to fit in, to stand out, to attract the attention of the opposite sex etc, etc.

Last weekend, I went to the Museum of Anthropology here in Vancouver and I spent a good few hours admiring all the beautiful objects and artifacts from aboriginal cultures from all over the world. Many of these objects were colourfully and intricately decorated. Some of the objects were purely decorative and others had some function, lots of a spiritual or religious nature.



I was trying to decide why these objects seemed less frivilous and acceptable to me. Because they were displayed in a museum?...

I decided it was because all of these objects had been hand-made. Each one was individual. Time and love and been invested in these objects. They represented a moment in that person and family's history. There was something inherently spiritual about these objects regardless of their purpose. And there is something special about that. I know that the few belongings I have of my grandparents are very special to me and are treasured, because they are representations of their memory and how important they were to me. It is the same for these objects in the museum, a lot would have been past down through generations. They were a record of history, the story of a culture.

I don't think we have that any more in the developed world, or very rarely. How often do we buy something handmade or even make something ourselves. Most things that we buy and own are mass-produced. There is also this attitude that everything is disposable. We buy things so cheaply that we think we can wear a dress once and then throw it away. We are so distanced from the process involved in making these things and we can get things so easily. Most things we buy are easily replaceable - we could buy the exact same object again. We haven't seen it being made or know who made it, in fact it's often made by a machine, so there is nothing of ourselves invested in that object.

After the visit to the museum I decided that I want to create 'artifacts' for my family and have some kind of skill/craft that I can pass down to my children, that becomes part of our heritage. I thought about all the happy times I spent as a child 'creating' something with my mum and sister (usually a mess) and the happy afternoons I've spent with friends or family crafting. I think of the wonderful homemade gifts and cards I've been given and how treasured they are.

The visit to the museum also made me realise that every culture throughout history has sought to decorate and identify themselves and their homes. It is a 'human' thing to want to do. So does that allow me to buy a new wardrobe?;)